life · sexuality · sodomy

A life cut short by sin

ring around divorce

True story. He came from a two-parent home, had ties to the church in his early years, was very educated and intelligent with a post-graduate degree, had a beautiful wife, beautiful children, a nice house, a good upwardly mobile job with good benefits, but none of these things seemed to satisfy him. Something happened in his childhood that influenced him to go in the wrong direction. Instead of fighting the bad influences and listening to godly counsel in his adult years, he caved to the lustful, fleshly cravings that were opened to him after being sexually abused as a child.

Having dated his girlfriend for several years before marrying her, he still secretly fed his desires–for other men, for pornography, for substance abuse. Maybe he thought since he was young, talented, and intelligent, he would live forever while he did things that were harmful to not only his body, but harmful to his family. But it all began to unravel for my acquaintance when his wife caught him with another man. He knew the risks, but rebelliously ignored them. So a nasty separation and divorce proceedings ensued. I can’t begin to imagine how betrayed and devastated she must have felt.

When he told me about his marriage ending, who did he blame? His soon to be ex-wife. But I knew something wasn’t quite right. The red flags came up when my acquaintance would tell me how he loved to hang out in bars to drink when he traveled for work before the breakup. After the breakup he boasted of going to a topless show in Vegas. We obviously didn’t have the same interests and that prevented me from getting too close to him.

Then I found out recently he died of HIV/AIDS. It was a shock to me. The lies he told me were exposed in his death. That’s how I found out about him cheating on his wife, his sleeping with other men, when he lied to me and said it was his wife who cheated. He did what felt good to his flesh and paid the ultimate price, losing his family and then his young life. He had a promising future, but became his own worst enemy and destroyed himself, even going off his meds that helped him fight the disease. Was everything he said to me a lie? Were the bars he was hanging out in gay bars? Did he reconcile with God or make amends with his ex-wife and kids during his two-year losing battle with HIV/AIDS? I may never find out in this life. But it has strengthened my already strong resolve to live my life God’s way. The world’s way really does lead to death in more ways than one.

For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? Mark 8:36-37


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